An entry for me, because I have grown..

Tonight, I cried. Partly because I could, partly because I was tired. I thought it was because I went to bed at 2, and was up again at 6:30. And then I reflected on the past week.

Dave left... he is in Twin Falls, indefinitely, until some rentals are fixed up and ready to sell. I feel alone. I come home each night, with 3 little ones, to an empty home. The porch light is not even left on, I'm sure it was because I forgot that Dave really isn't home tonight and I didn't turn it on.

Our week began with news that our friends were in a serious accident just before father's day. Being able to help them has been a great opportunity for us to serve our Heavenly Father. It is truly amazing how quickly a life can be taken from us, and at the same time how another's life can be so blessed. Our prayers go out to their sweet family. Although they are mourning a loss, they are also celebrating a life. They have witnessed many miracles through this difficult time and it strengthens my testimony of the power of the Priesthood and the plan that our Heavenly Father has for each of us. Treasure and cherish each day that you have with your families...make each day the very best and remember to emulate love around you!

Madison had surgery, that ended up being an all day adventure. My sweet little girl didn't understand why she was in so much pain and felt so dizzy and sick. When she went in, she was a typical healthy and happy little girl. When she came out, she was grumpy, tired, hungry and in a LOT of pain. I sat and held her in the chair for hours. It felt good to have some alone time with her, although, next time, I know we will be doing something much better for our girls adventure! I was saddened that Dave wasn't there for me to lean on. I am so used to him being there for every little thing our family goes through. I guess some would say, SPOILED. I was very THANKFUL for great family and neighbors who were there to help give a blessing and watch the kids!

I had to load the car twice with garage sale "stuff" by myself, to make a mere $100. That was honestly harder than a days work teaching! I took for granted all the times Dave got up early to set up tables and pull out the "junk". I would roll out of bed at 7:00, get dressed and start to sell. He would take care of the kids while I "socialized" with the public.

Today, I had to get the kids up by six, spend until 3:00 selling our junk, while wrestling 3 little hooligans, endure the pains of a royal sunburn, deliver the unsold to D.I., repack the empty boxes, sunshades, tables, etc. , drive 3 cranky tired kids home, unpack the full car to get to the 3 now-sleeping-kids, haul the kids up to their beds--one at a time, console a tired one who cut her foot getting out of the car, and finally re-put her back in bed. I now look forward to going in to kiss their sweet chubby cheeks goodnight. They really did endure well today.

Then, with a husband gone, I have had my usual car trouble. It always happens when my "fix-it-all" husband is away, and I am here alone, to solve the problem. Mind you, with 3 small children in tow! Thankfully, they too are once again patient, as for the 5th time this week, the car won't start, and we have to find someone with jumper cables, because mom's forgetful mind has forgotten to replace them in the van. I never seem to remember until I need them, although I pass them in the garage daily! Thank you Brett and the Lamb's for bailing me out on many occasions! I think I'll be walking from now on!

Now, to end my evening, the Bishop would like to meet with me tomorrow at 1:00. So, at 10:00 at night, I have decided that all will work out in the end. Church ends at noon, the kids will come home, eat lunch and with my GOOD luck, fall right asleep for a great nap. The DILEMMA? I am suppose to be able to take a nap tomorrow while they are sleeping...! And now, to find someone to sit with the 3 sleeping beauties tomorrow! I guess I will retire to bed early tomorrow!

I am beginning to realize just how very selfish my life has become. Those around me might describe me as generous and full of service, and I would like to agree. However, when it comes to my immediate family, I think I have let them down a little. It has literally taken a miracle for me to see the trap I was in. My Heavenly Father is REALLY looking out for me. In the last month, I feel closer to Him than I have in a very long time. I am soooo very grateful for the last 4 months that I have had to learn, and grow...spiritually and emotionally. If I dare say so, I think I am beginning to "act my age" spiritually. Dave's job loss has been such a blessing for us. Yes, we have altered our lives significantly, as one should in this situation, and we are going to come out the better for it. We may not have a whole lot of worldly wealth right now, but we have each other and our 3 wonderful kids! And that is everything we need right now.

I LOVE my husband. I am very grateful for what he has provided us with. I miss him and can't wait for him to come home. I hope that I am a changed person when he returns because my life has been so richly blessed for having him in it. Do not look back on yesterday, but look forward to tomorrow and make it better than the day before. I need him in my life and feel such peace with what lies ahead for the two of us. It may NOT always be easy, but I KNOW that with him, it is sooo worth it!

I thank my Heavenly Father for the blessings that he has sent me...I know He lives...He loves us and is aware of our every need. We may not see what lies ahead of us, but He knows and if we stay close to Him, it will be revealed to us, when the time is right. Have faith and press forward!
I love the familiar primary chorus: "lead me guide me walk beside me, help me find the way, teach me all that I must do, to live with him some day." I sing it many times during the week to my little kiddo's and know they feel the spirit when they hear those words. I know that He is leading us as we walk through life and that if I let Him guide me that I will live with Him some day...I look forward to that day, to sit with my dear family and friends beside me. Through these trying times, my faith has increased, I have felt humbled. I have been filled with much love. I hope the patience comes next! I sincerely pray that it continues to grow stronger and that I can really be a blessing to my own family as I come to appreciate the true beauty that they are in my life! Love to you all, my dear Dave, Madison, Jacob and Brooklyn. You are truly the treasures in my life!

Goodnight and sweet dreams!

5 love languages of children...and "dugs for sale"

I recently dug up, and yes...literally...dug...out of the garage...a box. A medium sized box. I was EXTREMELY happy to find this medium box. In this medium box were some books. Some very important books...Some very important books I would like to READ...not just sit in the medium sized BOX...

So the other day, I unpacked these important books out of the medium box and started to read! It was amazing! I read in the day...the middle of the day...and very late into the night...and any other time I could find to read these important books from the medium box. I was intrigued by what I was reading...so much that I am using my new important knowledge from the medium box on my little children. And oh, oh, oh how it works!

See, I love these 3 little children very much. And I want to understand thier little minds very much. I want to be the best little mommy for these little children....So I read, and learn, and apply, practice and re-apply and then I start the cycle all over again.

The little treasure I dug out of the medium sized box is the book titled "the 5 love languages of children"...and I like it very much! I have learned to become a better listener when I am with my little ones. I have learned to touch more...to hug and kiss, rock and hold, dance and jump--I have learned to give them little gifts when they have done something really, really well---I have learned to spend time with them...to get down on the floor and play cars, babies, playdough, go on bike rides, play at the park(not just sit on the bench)...I have learned how important it is to speak words of love and praise so that THEY understand it...I have learned to LIVE in the lives of a 5, 4 and 1 year old..and I LOVE it!

I am so glad for buried treasures that are found! I am thankful for "enlightened" moments that make me want to be a better person--and especially a better mother to my 3 little children who I love so dearly. There is always a new adventure when children are around...yesterday I found enough patience to let 3 little ones dig dirt out of a hole, find worms in it, make the worms a home in a little 3" cup, make a sign to put on the front door that reads: dugs for sale.. and get so excited to sell them! They really are TREASURES in my life!

Rainy days and Sundays somehow turn around...

It was an absolutely amazing Sunday Morning....The kids and I wanted to get up early and walk to church today (they are really into walking lately)...but it was RAINING! Anywhooo...Dave got up and went to correlation this morning at 7:30, so I knew I would have to be up early to get the kids breakfast, dressed and in the car to be on time for church today. We are always at least 20 min. late--whoops!

Brooklyn woke up sometime in the middle of the night and wouldn't settle, so we finally put her in bed with us and tried to go back to sleep. However, it is nearly impossible with a 1 1/2 year old kicking you, trying to define "HER" space in "OUR" bed. Then she decided to wake up when
Dave did--I wasn't quite ready for this, but decided I had better get the show on the road! Shortly after, Madison and Jacob woke up and I quickly whipped them into gear:) We had already had baths last night and church clothes picked out, so I felt we were one step ahead of the game! I quickly made some yummy cinnamon roll oatmeal--their favorite--got each of them dressed and hair done and had them sit on the couch quietly to read some books while I got ready. Surprisingly, they did as told, I was able to get ready in about 15 minutes and we were 2 minutes late/on-time for us! The kids all went in happily to their classes. Brooklyn was our usual handfull during Sacrament Meeting, but 1/2 way through she fell asleep--oh how wonderful for me! Then all 3 kids came home and took a great afternoon nap! All is well in Zion today--okay, so our home is reall y NOT zion, but today it sure felt like it! Thanks kiddo's for helping to have a wonderful morning!

Count My Many Blessings...

After reading my cousins blog about quiet times and reflections, I felt inspired to share my thoughts tonight. I've been meaning to do this for a while and it seems like the nights are so busy. So thanks Matt--for inspiring me to take these few moments to be thankful and reflect upon the great blessings in my life.

I have to be so grateful for the time I have to spend with Dave right now. It is NOT easy to have him out of work--especially with the struggle of finding a job in this crazy economy. However, we both feel that it was a good thing, and that good will come of it. We are enjoying getting to "know" each other again. It seemed like 6 long years of tag team with work and kids and we had very little time to spend together. So, it has been so nice to enjoy "dating" again.

I am also so very grateful for such a sweet cousin! Debi--you seem to amaze me in every way and are there when the kids and I need it the most! You have touched my heart in the most amazing way with your sensitivity to the kids and their frustrations in moving. Jacob has taken to Leah and just LOVES his playdates with her. He is always soooo excited when he comes home and he told me today that he even likes macaroni and cheese now--"so don't worry mom--one of your kids likes it now":) Thanks you so much for letting our kiddo's share this friendship!

I am thankful for all of the little "ANGELS" that are looking out for our family! You are all so amazing and I am thankful for all of your little secret sharings! Tonight we had the kids in bed, all except Brooklyn, and we were eating dinner and talking when the doorbell rang. I didn't hear a "hello" when Dave answered, and he soon came back into the room holding the cutest pot of paper flowers and candy! What a special moment to be thought of tonight! Also, I had the cutest preschool mom "over-pay" me and when I tried to figure it out--she said it was a little bonus! The thoughtfulness keeps pouring in from the most un-expected moments.

I took Madison and Jacob to gymnastics tonight--it is always so much fun to watch them! One of the things I love the most is seeing them learn a new skill and sharing it with a look over thier shoulder at me! The look on their faces says"Look mom--I did it!" ever so proud! I am so proud of them and the milestones they have made in gym. Another thing I love is the teacher/child relationship! It is the ONLY gymnastics place we have found that has the belief and philosophy of building the esteem of the child. Each teacher (and there are several) lives and portrays this theme to all of the children all of the time! I am grateful for their confidence, patience and time spent with my own children and hope it is something my kids will be able to continue! A HUGE THANKS to FLIPS gymnastics for a job very well done! My children love you!

Last night I had some errands to run and I was listening to music while driving. As I got to the end and was ready to head home I thought that I could just keep on driving down the freeway--with no end in sight and never looking back. It was so peaceful to just drive and think. And the force that brought me to exit the freeway and head home was my sweet husband and three adorable little children--who count on me and depend on me in the most important way. I love them so much and am so grateful for their smiling faces and happy expectations in life!

I believe their are angels among us, sent down to us from somewhere up above...they come to you and me in our darkest moments, to show us how to live, to teach us how to give, to guide us with a light of LOVE! Thank you to all of you ANGELS out there--whoever, and wherever you are!

alison

St. Patrick's Day Parade

Our favorite, the bagpipers!

this is green!

the green machine

The "gang" watching the parade go by

My cute girls ready for the day

Cold weather, again!

Just as fast as the good weather came, it left us! We were back to coats, gloves and boots for this one!

A little taste of spring...

The kids have been soooo anxious to get out and play. When the weather warmed up they begged to ride bikes and shoot balls. Madison just learned how to ride her bike without training wheels--yeah madi! And jake is a huge sports fan and is loving the basketball hoop that grandma gave him.

The Story of the "Little Red Hen"...(Adams Style)

One day, Alison decided to make some bread. She noticed that everyone around her was starting to make their own bread and it seemed pretty easy. Now, she was raised on her dad's famous wheat bread, but his recipe seemed to be a 24 hour process. With 3 little kids to help, she thought it would be wiser to find a "simpler" recipe. Especially since this would be her first attempt. One day, her visiting teacher stopped by and announced that she had a wonderful recipe to try, with a DVD to show you how to do it. Alison thought that was a great idea. Another day, her mother-in-law, Maureen, sent a loaf of homemade bread back with Dave and mentioned that she, too, had a great recipe she used. Alison liked the idea of grinding the wheat, kneading the dough, watching it rise, baking the bread and finally eating it. She liked the idea of having fresh ground wheat to use for her bread--yum! So she asked: Who will help me grind the wheat? Maureen said: I will! Who will help me mix the dough? Jacob said: I will! Who will help me bake the bread? Madison said: I will! So, she used the ground wheat (sent from Maureen), she kneaded the dough (thanks to the Bosch and Jacob), she watched it rise for 45 minutes (thanks to yeast and an oven) and she baked the bread (thanks to Madison). Then she said: Who will help me eat the bread? Just then Dave walked in from work, took one little sniff... and said: I WILL! And so there we sat, eating the most delicious homemade wheat bread---made from scratch!

*My idea is to start simple and work my way into my dad's recipes. He really does put a lot into his bread and makes it everytime we visit! The kids absolutely love it and it is so healthy. I also figured that it costs about $.50-.75 a loaf compared to $4.00 at great harvest! And it has no preservatives or sugar.

Angels Among Us

While we lived in Ogden, we had the opportunity of meeting many wonderful friends. Some of them moved away before we did, and others moved around the same time. This past week has been a hard one, as both Madison and Jacob have decided they want to move back to our life in Ogden. They really loved it there and want their old rooms, their friends, their teachers, their babysitter, and their sledding hill all back in their possession! One of the neatest opportunities we had was to develop a friendship with the Seamons family. Sarah's husband was deployed for a year and Dave was always working or commuting. Therefore, it left the wives and our three little ones to bond. And boy did we do that! We are so grateful for the little moments we were able to get together with them: playdates, wading in the ditch, pirate parties, cookie decorating, Christmas villages in the city, the christmas parades, visiting Mrs. Claus, sacrament meetings---the list goes on forever! Thank you for being such wonderful friends--the kids really miss Chayse, Ashtyn and Jaxyn. Here is our little "good-bye" evening almost a year ago!

Influential people in my life...

Dave and I just finished reading(listening too) The Five People You Meet In Heaven. We decided to try a book on tape, due to the many interruptions we have while trying to read at home. It has been fun to listen to it together whenever we are in the car. We finished it on our last road trip to Idaho. We both enjoyed the book and I began reflecting over some of the influential people in my life. Here are a few:

Julie Blick--for giving me the confidence and experience to get through school and get a degree! Not only did I get the degree, but I graduated with honors!

Wayne Carlos--another influential person in my life--although he may not realize it! He hired me as his Director for a preschool in Ogden. After a year of working there and gaining experience, he walked in one day and fired me! It was crazy times--and through some friends, I quickly got a job at a local hospital, met Barb, who eventually set me up with Dave--my loving and supporting husband. Looking back, it was no coincedence that Wayne fired me when he did--I just didn't know what my Heavenly Father had in store for me!

Kathy Morgan was a Relief Society President I had while attending the college ward in Twin Falls, Idaho. She made me her "project" during my wandering years! And I didn't mind a bit! It was her influence and belief in me that helped me gain a testimony of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. In turn, this led me to the desire to serve a mission for the LDS Church--an experience that turned my life around and brought me closer to my Heavenly Father and family--the foundation of my life. Thanks Kathy for your unconditional friendship!

Annette and Tom Tucker--my college ward bishop and his wife who became two of my greatest friends during early college life! What a great influence--thanks you two!

Scot--my brother who continues to watch over me from Heaven--even after all these years! I often feel he is the guardian angel over my children and influences me to make the best of each day! Can't wait to see what our reunion in Heaven will be like!

Now, for all of you readers, keep in mind that there are many of you who have had a significant influence in my life. However, if you have not read the book, the 5 people are not the people you come in contact with daily or frequently. They are simply people that have crossed your path and influenced you--people who come and go--and you may really never know the reason they entered your life. These people I listed are ones I don't really stay in contact with any more, however, thier influence in my life was real and significant. And thank you to all those who continue to be there for me--for your advice, direction, influence and friendship!